Hot Soda Apparatus - World Tour 2000

a) we are never doing any live performances. this would detract from our inherent dysfunctionality.

c) any travelling we do together that totals more than 50 miles [darn those trips to Ira's house] is us going to some other band's live performance, and our musical talents (or lack thereof) are left behind.

Now that we've cleared up any misunderstanding,
the following is our summer tour schedule.

Day	City	Venue	Time	Cost
14 May 2k	Tulsa, OK	Denny's	11:43 PM	Free; house minimum 1 (one) cherry Vanilla Coke
15 May 2k	Bixby, OK	That shed behind Ira's place	4:51 PM	Sticker price of a Land Rover; those roads are a b****
17 May 2k	Tulsa, OK	Tulsa Convention Center	7:00 PM	$12.25 in advance, $18.50 at the door.
29 May 2k	Oklahoma City	Myriad Convention Center	2:00 PM	$8.50, sold at door only
12 June 2k	Dallas, TX	Texas Motor Speedway	6:30 PM	$22.50 in advance, $13.00 from the scalpers out front
14 June 2k	Dallas, TX	The Galleria	All Day	Free; come and watch us harass those yuppies in their fur coats in the middle of June
19 June 2k	Irving, TX	Texas Stadium	10:00 PM	Upon entry, you will be asked to leave your wallet with the usher. Missing credit cards are not our responsibility.
23 June 2k	Kansas City, MO	KC Performing Arts Center	4:30 PM	$7.50. With special guests Flipknot and the Kovaring Pumpkins
24 June 2k	Kansas City, MO	Denny's	11:03 PM	Free; house minimum 1 (one) Chocolate Shake

The webmaster feels your pain: For those of you running this webbrowser in a resolution less than 1024x768, this page most certainly looks like crap. I won't tell you to change your resolution, because that would be domineering and pompous of me to expect such a sheeplike response from you. Just know that this page was designed for a larger desktop area, and don't blame me for its unaesthetic appearence.